Mother's Day - May 9th, 2010

What a difference a year makes...I remember last Mother's Day, it doesn't seem that long ago at all.

Matt surprised me with a night downtown to the Hotel Monaco and night out jumping from place to place trying out different martini's. He gave me a card that said "I know you're going to be a great Mother one day..." as sweet as it was, it stung a little too.

I'd gotten to the point where I wondered if I'd ever be given a chance to prove his comment right or not. It seemed like it was never going to happen for us. Matt never gave up but I admit I let my mind go there often....and the truth is, we really didn't struggle to get pregnant for near as long as some of my friends and family have. Some would say we didn't struggle at all...

So this Mother's Day thinking back on where we were at a year ago, how I was feeling a year ago...brings up so many emotions.

I am so very thankful and so very blessed. I have a amazing husband who honestly, I thought I couldn't love anymore than I already did and then McClellan was born. He is more amazing as a partner and father than I ever could have imagined. I hear Matt talk to her, watch her interact with her and immediately fall more in love with him.

I look at McClellan and my heart swells so much with love that I worry it may explode. How is it possible that a year ago I was wondering if this day would ever come...and here I am a Mother to the most beautiful little girl in the world? Every little breath she takes, every little wide eyed look, each time she melts into my arms...I am reminded of how lucky I am. Yes even at 3:00 in the morning when it seems like she'll never sleep again, when her cries are louder than I've ever heard, when I've just changed her diaper and within minutes she needs to be changed again...I am thankful.

12 months ago my Mother's Day weekend was filled with martinis, watching the Nuggets playoff games in bars downtown, Matt spending too much money on an amazing hotel downtown and a card telling me that one day I'd be a good Mother.

This year my Mother's Day looked like this-woke up at 4:30am to the sounds/cries of my daughter (I still can't believe I'm saying that) waking up and wanting to be fed. After a semi-failed attempt at breast feeding she and I cuddled in bed and fell back asleep. Soon Matt was walking through the door with flowers and breakfast in bed. All three of us stayed in bed for awhile, just enjoying every minute of this special day. Our afternoon was spent taking McClellan on her first walk and first trip to the park-it was a perfect day.

Last year's Mother's Day was nice...but I'll take a lifetime of Mother's Day's like this years from now on please.